Naturally Kish

November 18, 2012

Since last we met…..

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 11:56 pm

I shared last week about my breakthrough of sorts. Well since then, my outlook on things has been…. interesting. Scary even.

Apparently, I actually like myself –  the good, the bad, the indifferent.  All of it.  Its a part of my existence. Now, I’m not talking about the outer appearance because we all know i loves me some Kish.  I got the pics to prove it.  Lol

What I’m speaking of is that vulnerable jewel on the inside that has endured so much but still has the desire to be whole.  Yeah, her. She effing rocks!!!!! 

I have come a long way but it seems like nowhere when i look at where GOD wants to take me.  I am worth it.  I deserve it.  I claim it.

Thanks for allowing me to share.

Until next time……

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November 11, 2012

Today I Cried

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:47 pm

And I mean cried a river!! In front of other people. A hard, ugly cry!

It felt SO GOOD!!!!!

The tears were a sign to me that all that sh!t i thought I had under control, I don’t. I’m still existing.  I have yet to begin living.  Its that same mask that I wear when I tell myself that im fat and fly, or that Idgaf how others view me or what their opinion of me is. 

The difference today though, a sister that does not even really know me basically read me like a book.  She is me. Or she was. And she could pick up from my energy the heaviness that I carry and bury daily. 

The cry was reminiscent of Sheila in Why Did I Get Married when she was in the powder room with her girlfriends and she was sharing her transformation with them.

It was freeing. Like a deep exhale. 

I’m about to embark on the most vulnerable period in my life but i know I will be better once it is complete. 

I thank Allah (God) for the people he has placed in my life.  There is a lesson to be learned or the same mistakes will be made over and over again. I can’t keep on this cycle. 

(SN) Right before my cry I was talking to the BFF and she was cussing me out (with love) via text message about some improper choices I’ve made.  Its interesting how those two events happened simultaneously but are directly connected.

IM LISTENING!! I SUBMIT!!!

Thank you for sharing in my experience. Peace and Love!

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