Naturally Kish

December 7, 2012

Same, yet different

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:30 am

I’ve been in a constant reflection period over the last month or so.  I was remembering that last year I said 2012 was the year of ‘shit or get off the pot’.

It was gonna be the year where all these changes were going to take place, how my whole life was gonna be different. 

Fast forward ….December 2012. Still living in the same apartment, driving the same vehicle, working the same job. But yet SO MUCH HAS CHANGED.

Oftentimes we ignore those things we can’t see or touch because its not physical or tangible but let me tell you I am not that same Lakisha of old. 

I’m not going to bombard you with all the changes that have taken place.  No need. Action speaks far louder than words.

I will say that I am so thankful for the experiences that have shaped me (good and bad) and the mercy of Allah, GOD that He wakes me everyday so that I may take another stab at this thing called life.

And I’m ever grateful for those special people placed in my life.  You all have undoubtedly helped me more than you will ever know.  I love me and therefore, can love you. 

Until next time…… Hugs and love!

Same, yet different

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:30 am

I’ve been in a constant reflection period over the last month or so.  I was remembering that last year I said 2012 was the year of ‘shit or get off the pot’.

It was gonna be the year where all these changes were going to take place, how my whole life was gonna be different. 

Fast forward ….December 2012. Still living in the same apartment, driving the same vehicle, working the same job. But yet SO MUCH HAS CHANGED.

Oftentimes we ignore those things we can’t see or touch because its not physical or tangible but let me tell you I am not that same Lakisha of old. 

I’m not going to bombard you with all the changes that have taken place.  No need. Action speaks far louder than words.

I will say that I am so thankful for the experiences that have shaped me (good and bad) and the mercy of Allah, GOD that He wakes me everyday so that I may take another stab at this thing called life.

And I’m ever grateful for those special people placed in my life.  You all have undoubtedly helped me more than you will ever know.  I love me and therefore, can love you. 

Until next time…… Hugs and love!

Same, yet different

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:27 am

I’ve been in a constant reflection period over the last month or so.  I was remembering that last year I said 2012 was the year of ‘shit or get off the pot’.

It was gonna be the year where all these changes were going to take place, how my whole life was gonna be different. 

Fast forward ….December 2012. Still living in the same apartment, driving the same vehicle, working the same job. But yet SO MUCH HAS CHANGED.

Oftentimes we ignore those things we can’t see or touch because its not physical or tangible but let me tell you I am not that same Lakisha of old. 

I’m not going to bombard you with all the changes that have taken place.  No need. Action speaks far louder than words.

I will say that I am so thankful for the experiences that have shaped me (good and bad) and the mercy of Allah, GOD that He wakes me everyday so that I may take another stab at this thing called life.

And I’m ever grateful for those special people placed in my life.  You all have undoubtedly helped me more than you will ever know.  I love me and therefore, can love you. 

Until next time…… Hugs and love!

Same, yet different

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:27 am

I’ve been in a constant reflection period over the last month or so.  I was remembering that last year I said 2012 was the year of ‘shit or get off the pot’.

It was gonna be the year where all these changes were going to take place, how my whole life was gonna be different. 

Fast forward ….December 2012. Still living in the same apartment, driving the same vehicle, working the same job. But yet SO MUCH HAS CHANGED.

Oftentimes we ignore those things we can’t see or touch because its not physical or tangible but let me tell you I am not that same Lakisha of old. 

I’m not going to bombard you with all the changes that have taken place.  No need. Action speaks far louder than words.

I will say that I am so thankful for the experiences that have shaped me (good and bad) and the mercy of Allah, GOD that He wakes me everyday so that I may take another stab at this thing called life.

And I’m ever grateful for those special people placed in my life.  You all have undoubtedly helped me more than you will ever know.  I love me and therefore, can love you. 

Until next time…… Hugs and love!

November 18, 2012

Since last we met…..

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 11:56 pm

I shared last week about my breakthrough of sorts. Well since then, my outlook on things has been…. interesting. Scary even.

Apparently, I actually like myself –  the good, the bad, the indifferent.  All of it.  Its a part of my existence. Now, I’m not talking about the outer appearance because we all know i loves me some Kish.  I got the pics to prove it.  Lol

What I’m speaking of is that vulnerable jewel on the inside that has endured so much but still has the desire to be whole.  Yeah, her. She effing rocks!!!!! 

I have come a long way but it seems like nowhere when i look at where GOD wants to take me.  I am worth it.  I deserve it.  I claim it.

Thanks for allowing me to share.

Until next time……

November 11, 2012

Today I Cried

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:47 pm

And I mean cried a river!! In front of other people. A hard, ugly cry!

It felt SO GOOD!!!!!

The tears were a sign to me that all that sh!t i thought I had under control, I don’t. I’m still existing.  I have yet to begin living.  Its that same mask that I wear when I tell myself that im fat and fly, or that Idgaf how others view me or what their opinion of me is. 

The difference today though, a sister that does not even really know me basically read me like a book.  She is me. Or she was. And she could pick up from my energy the heaviness that I carry and bury daily. 

The cry was reminiscent of Sheila in Why Did I Get Married when she was in the powder room with her girlfriends and she was sharing her transformation with them.

It was freeing. Like a deep exhale. 

I’m about to embark on the most vulnerable period in my life but i know I will be better once it is complete. 

I thank Allah (God) for the people he has placed in my life.  There is a lesson to be learned or the same mistakes will be made over and over again. I can’t keep on this cycle. 

(SN) Right before my cry I was talking to the BFF and she was cussing me out (with love) via text message about some improper choices I’ve made.  Its interesting how those two events happened simultaneously but are directly connected.

IM LISTENING!! I SUBMIT!!!

Thank you for sharing in my experience. Peace and Love!

October 15, 2012

Just do it

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 12:40 am

Woke up this morning and thought ‘I’m going to the gym’  I know, shocked me too. Lol.

Anyway, brushed my teeth, got dressed and to the gym I went. I can honestly say i feel good. And after I weighed myself and that scale said 263.5 I didn’t pass out or break up those good peoples things by throwing it across the locker room. I accepted it as what happens when you give up the ghost. I’m not happy but I’m not sad either. Every action has consequences. Mine are gaining weight and staying depressed if i
don’t stay true to my goals. First step is acknowledgement right???

Two words: lifestyle change!!!!!

Another chance to get it right is all i can ask……. happy day folks! Muah

September 30, 2012

Fell off is an understatement

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:43 am

So, when we last talked (lol, I am too funny) idk what we talked about. I can’t remember. Its been THAT long. 

Let’s play catch up……..

I think the last blog post was some time in August near the end of Ramadan. Let me start from there.

So I was supposed to be going to two a day workouts. HA. THATS FUNNY!!!! I did it for 2 days and then my bed won the battle.  I love it too much to leave it so early knowing I won’t see it again til late in the evening. 

Well when I stopped the two a days I pretty much stopped exercising completely. With the exception of my Body Jam and Zumba classes. No treadmill. No ab work. No weight training. No nuffin!

OK, I did pick up something, food! That pattern that is oh too familiar…since im not exercising I may as well eat.  The self sabotaging trend has reared it’s ugly head.

And then the birthday comes. If you know me then you know all bets are off during national holiday time. I go hard in the paint. So of course I haven’t been to my classes cause ‘im taking this week off’ WTH!!!! Please tell me how that makes any ounce of sense…..

Told yawl, my self worth can turn on and off like a switch. At least I  know this and can work to correct it.

So here we are 2day, feeling fat, looking fatter, sick and filled with regret. The amount of garbage I’ve consumed in this past week is just embarrassing. I dont regret celebrating me, because im awesome. I just wish I had made better choices.

I keep asking myself, wth happened? No answers. Im not having a pity party. Im confident that i will get back on track. I will not give up. I can’t. GOD didn’t make me that way. 

I’ll talk to you later lovies! Thanks for reading!!!

August 15, 2012

Dissapointed….briefly

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 12:02 am

As my fast is coming to a close I decided to go ahead and weigh myself at the gym last night.  According to the scale i’ve only lost 4 pounds. At first I was sad, like the real kind.  The make you wanna throw stuff kind! But then I began to analyze these past 3.5 weeks.  See, that’s what I do, I analyze (and sometimes over analyze) everything. 

So, let me put things in perspective for myself. The only thing i’ve taken out of my diet is meat, including fish.  I’ve been snacking, drinking juices, and loving this lil thing called pasta. Oh yeah, plus i’ve been skimping on the gym. I forgot to mention that….. HA

Anyway, it further proves that there is no such thing as a successful ‘diet’. One MUST make a lifestyle change.  I’m thinking because I’m not wolfing down Stokos and Chipotle that the weight is just gonna fall off.  YOU BIG DUMMY!!!! LOL I didn’t really think that but I didn’t really think about how what I was eating along w/ the time I was eating and the lack of exercise would affect my efforts. I don’t want to seem ungrateful because lord knows those 4 pounds could’ve been an addition instead of a subtraction. I just find that when I voice how I feel or how things affect me, it gives me a reference point when those feeling come back around later in life. 

I’m thankful for my 4 pound deduction and I plan to work harder and smarter to continue on the road to be a fit Kish.  2 a days starting Monday.  Who’s gonna meet me at the Lake at 6??? 6am that is. Time to go hard in the paint to end this year strong!!!! 

Thanks for the support, thanks for reading my thoughts and thanks for being you!!! Smooches and XOXOXO

 

July 25, 2012

A Short Praise Break

Filed under: Uncategorized — naturallykish @ 1:36 am

I’m too blessed to be stressed!!!!

I have been blessed with some of the most beautiful people in my life. Some I’ve known for years and some I’ve known for a short time. I just wanna say to you all that I’m thankful that you have been placed in my life. I may not tell you often but I Luv my Sugahs!!!!!! There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of a convo had, a laugh shared, a fb post, a text, a tweet or a phone call that made my day a little brighter. The people God has placed in my life serve an awesome purpose. I certainly hope you all know this!

Ok, keeping this one short and sweet. Smooches for now!!! XOXOXO

….Now back to your regularly scheduled programming…..

« Previous PageNext Page »

Blog at WordPress.com.